Monday, June 20, 2016

Marriages and KUNG FU



The two words are synonymous! Let me explain.

My husband and I have been married for almost six months now. He is a peace loving soul and would like for us to never ever fight. My reaction to that 'want' apart from some eye rolling is one single 'pfffft'. Now, before I go on, I'd just like to say for myself that I would also love peace, who wouldn't? 

Now that we've established that, let me also say that I'm very short tempered. My patience levels are low, and I react. I'm bad at hiding, even for over five minutes how I feel about a situation. SO bad in fact that I don't even need to say a single word. My face says it all! And my husband for one, knows exactly when that expression changes as well (he's a quick learner).

He gets upset that I'm upset now and instead of calmly working through the reaction as we should do as full grown adults we panic and say things that have no relevance. We get angry and say hurtful things. 

In short, we Kung Fu. 

I'm using the term Kung Fu, (a) coz we both LOVE Kung Fu Panda :) Who doesn't?! and  (b) coz it sounds so much cuter and much less ugly than the word 'fight' and remember how we don't like to do that really. 

My husband often worries that we Kung Fu too much. For me, when I am in Kung Fu mode I wish we hadn't started. But when we finish and I take one moment to think about all of it calmly I am only reminded of how madly I am in love with this peace lover. Of how, despite my deep emotions of wanting to run away from it all in that moment of anger, I realize every so often that even if I were to run, I would only run to him. 

We live in a country far from any place I've called home. But it was during our last Kung Fu when I was so upset and wished I could go 'home' that I realized he is my home and I have never felt more in love with him.

What I'm trying to say is that although all of us sometimes worry about how our relationships may be unhealthy because of what we assume is unnecessary bickering, a Kung Fu now and then with your significant other is essential to realize how good you have it and may even help remind you how lucky you are to have found that one person to Kung Fu with for the rest of your life! 

With or without momos for training ;) 

PS : I prefer 'with' ofcourse. Ahem, are you listening peace lover?